Y chromosome
My sista-friend says that the "Y" chromosome in men is at the root of all male/female issues. It makes them do things that just don't make sense. As women we are constantly asking "Why?" Why did he leave the wet towel in the middle of the bedroom floor? Why will he spend $200 on video games without thinking but get upset when I spend $200 on a pair of shoes?
I'm frustrated right now. I'm angry right now. I'm asking "Why?" He's damaged (who isn't), I know this. And I've exercised much patience over the past year and half. But now my patience is being strained. I am frustrated with the back and forth. The go then no go. The "let's do this" followed by "wait."
Throughout our relationship I would say he's been the pursuer, the aggressor. He's pushed for the next level. I've been the practical one. Encouraging patience and taking our time. While I've never allowed him to push me too far, too fast, I have coasted along not putting up too much resistance. I have not committed to anything, no matter how often he asked, until I was ready. So after months of his asking I finally said "yes." And although I said "yes" I negotiated a later date than he originally proposed.
Therefore imagine my surprise when during a conversation yesterday he says, "I don't like the pressure you're putting me under." Huh? For 8 months you ask me and I say "Let's wait. Let's see what happens. Let's not rush." and I'm pressuring you?! Why?!
So what I am I going to do? Let me tell you what I'm doing - I'm sitting in the middle of the floor, arms and legs crossed. I'm not moving. Not another step. I don't want to say we're going to do things my way, but his way ain't working. Something has got to change. It's time to renegotiate terms. Time to clear the air; establish expectations and guidelines. Time to de-mystify the "Y."
I'm frustrated right now. I'm angry right now. I'm asking "Why?" He's damaged (who isn't), I know this. And I've exercised much patience over the past year and half. But now my patience is being strained. I am frustrated with the back and forth. The go then no go. The "let's do this" followed by "wait."
Throughout our relationship I would say he's been the pursuer, the aggressor. He's pushed for the next level. I've been the practical one. Encouraging patience and taking our time. While I've never allowed him to push me too far, too fast, I have coasted along not putting up too much resistance. I have not committed to anything, no matter how often he asked, until I was ready. So after months of his asking I finally said "yes." And although I said "yes" I negotiated a later date than he originally proposed.
Therefore imagine my surprise when during a conversation yesterday he says, "I don't like the pressure you're putting me under." Huh? For 8 months you ask me and I say "Let's wait. Let's see what happens. Let's not rush." and I'm pressuring you?! Why?!
So what I am I going to do? Let me tell you what I'm doing - I'm sitting in the middle of the floor, arms and legs crossed. I'm not moving. Not another step. I don't want to say we're going to do things my way, but his way ain't working. Something has got to change. It's time to renegotiate terms. Time to clear the air; establish expectations and guidelines. Time to de-mystify the "Y."
